You may well be thinking that these words do not belong together ” Self. Care. Routine. For. Mamas” I know what you are thinking…here comes another Mama that’s got her shit together and bloody does a workout, before her baby calmly wakes up smiling and has time to even blow dry her hair! No, no and no! I don’t think anyone really does have their shit together in motherhood…do they??
Even now nearly a year on, it has been known for me go to bed with the daily grime still on my face (shock, horror for a beauty therapist, trust me) or sometimes I don’t even get a shower in the morning or if I do, I can’t do it without a little person looking at me…..relaxing it ain’t. Some weeks the only action my hair gets, is a sprinkle of talc to mop up the grease!
But I’m all about TRYING to get self care into your day, week or at least once in the month!
You are the captain of your family, and if the captain isn’t looked after, the ship may just sink and we don’t want that!
Before Maddox I was all about positive morning routines..I would wake up, meditate, stretch, do affirmations/visualisations, have a hot lemon water, body brush, shower, read, have a slow breakfast. Some might call me barmy, but I truly think, me being calm during my pregnancy helped towards him being a little chilled dude on the outside world.
I am BIG on mindfulness, wellness and focusing on doing things, that make my heart sing. This life isn’t a dress rehearsal after all. A few years ago, I wrote down my ideal morning, in my ideal day covering every tiny detail. Its a brilliant exercise to do, to find out what you really want out of life and makes you realise the little things that you can implement now, to start to make you a bit more happier and content in your day. It’s was bloody life changing!
However, this is great in theory, but when your new alarm clock is a babino, the only stretching you get to do, is to reach for your phone to see what ungodly hour it is!
Straight after Maddox was born, I was lucky enough if I even left the bedroom before midday. I couldn’t even tell you why. My mind was a fuzz, just to get through the day was a massive achievement, my ideal day then was just for us both to survive it! Now days, it can still be a bit hit or miss…..his mood tends to control the morning! To me, for for own mental sanity trying to “aim” towards having a positive start to my day helps me stay calm and in control of being a Mama.
So I wrote a new ideal day with a baby in tow…
My morning tries to look like this (by no means every day! I do TRY to get organised the night before, like getting all the breakfast stuff out, filling the kettle up, clothes out if I can be really bothered)
*Wake up /maybe set alarm at a time earlier than when Maddox “normally” wakes up
*Listen to a you tube motivational video OR write what I’m grateful for OR write aims for the day
* Avoid social media
*Cleanse/tone /Moisturise (1x week exfoliate mixing with cleanser / 1x week mask on whilst in shower)
*Visualise my years goals whilst showering…I am all about setting goals!
*1x week body exfoliator
*2 x week wash my hair and style it (this very rarely happens without Rob being around)
*Once out shower….cellulite cream (one can hope) and favourite body cream
*If he is still asleep or stirring, I can maybe eat my breakie, have a cup of peppermint tea or start my makeup, get dressed
My aim is the above, it very rarely all happens and if I’m uber tired, I just stay in bed until I’m summoned by little man! I can still do my showering routine, but after he has had milk and I sit him in his baby rocker with a few toys which are always in the bathroom.
I decided that having a rushed morning just made me feel crap and stressed. It’s important to me for me to start calm and enjoy this little piece of me time. I really can’t emphasise enough…that I AIM to do some off the above, but I don’t beat myself up if it just doesn’t happen.
It’s not about setting unrealistic goals, that would just make you feel shitty that you never do them. Its about thinking of even small things that make you feel amazing, whilst winging it at motherhood! Even putting your best pants on every day – why save them?!
What is your ideal start to the day? Imagine the best morning you could possibly have? Write it down; in your phone, in a journal, anywhere that you can see it. What little things out of that list could you start tomorrow?
Maybe mornings are just a no go,,,what about 5-10 minutes during nap time or at night when everyone is in bed? What is your idea of self care? Taking 5-10 minutes to read a book, make a healthy smoothie, have a wine, watch Eastenders with a packet of hob nobs? There is no right or wrong…just think about what you love to do, that makes you go “ahhhh” and just chill out.
Remember though, be kind to yourself, if the shit hits the fan, and none of it happens. If you are aware of the small things that bring you peace and reminds you, that you are important, then on that good day, you are more aware to make it a reality. You are important, you need to love yourself and take care of you to!
Check out my instagram here to see how I go about adding selfcare in my daily life